I need to know
- A man chose a restaurant that he liked for his birthday dinner, bothering his father’s wife and his son who have restrictive diets
- The family demanded that dinner move out of the State to adapt to their preferences: he refused
- The man now faces a violent reaction for standing firm, but says that he no longer considers them a real family
A man seeks support from the Reddit community to obtain advice after a tense birthday dinner that revives years of unresolved family tensions. In his publication, the 22 -year -old explains how to choose a restaurant for his birthday caused a violent reaction from his father’s wife, Kathleen, and his son, Benjamin.
«My dad married Kathleen when he was 15 years old,» the poster shared, noting that Kathleen has two his own children, one of whom has never met. The one who does know, Benjamin, now 18, has multiple allergies and an extremely limited diet, which has long dictated family’s eating habits.
«Benjamin is allergic to peanuts and seafood,» the man wrote, adding that allergy is only part of the challenge. «In addition to that, he and Kathleen are very fussy dining rooms.»
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He remembered how the meals were always restricted when he lived with them. «His diet when he lived there consisted of pizza, fried potatoes and hamburgers and cheese and cheese tacos,» he shared. «I didn’t eat fruits or vegetables. I didn’t eat meat except beef.»
Kathleen also has a long list of dislikes. «I do not remember all the things I would not eat, but it included any type of fish, any type of potato, rice, pasta, bread and things like that,» wrote the redditor, and pointed out that this limited almost all family meals to only a few places of fast food.
Asking food to take or dinner as a family became an exhausting routine. «The food was never great, but it could have been worse,» he added. «I think the part that sucked was every time we asked for my birthday or went out for my birthday, it was one of the two places we had.»
Even simple options such as tacos were difficult to handle. «A taco place was outside unless all the vegetables and extras eliminated, except meat and cheese,» he recalled. «And some places still put ‘Gross S —‘ to quote Benjamin when they apparently fulfilled.»
As he grew up, his «family meals» began to jump, tired of being forced to his limited elections. «At any time they still want to make a family meal, we expect everyone to go to the chosen fast food places that work for Benjamin and Kathleen,» he explained. «And I’m tired of dealing with them.»
This year, for his birthday, he decided to do things differently. «A few weeks ago I had a birthday dinner with my girlfriend and a family and friends,» he wrote. «Dad wanted to come and I hoped Kathleen and Benjamin were also invited.»
The poster made it clear that they were welcome, as long as they were willing to eat at the restaurant they chose. «I told him it was fine if they eaten where he had chosen,» he shared. But shortly after, he found resistance.
«I received an email from Kathleen and called dad where they told me that my restaurant of choice did not meet the needs and requirements of Benjamin and Kathleen,» explained the Redditor. The couple even suggested that he and his guests were traveling outside the State for a more suitable dining option for them.
His answer was firm. «My answer was no and I told Dad that I could still come, but I wasn’t changing where my birthday dinner was having dinner,» he wrote. However, Kathleen did not take the refusal lightly.
«Kathleen sent another email asking why he was being as hostile as his daughter and I should worry about the health and interests of my family,» he said. The message hit a nerve, especially because he never met his daughter.
Tensions increased even more when their father and Kathleen learned that other members of their father’s family traveled to join the birthday celebration. «Dad and Kathleen were more annoying to know that Dad’s side flew to join us to dinner when they will not normally accept plans to eat,» the original poster continued.
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Now, he said, he faces the reaction even more for simply choosing a restaurant he liked. «So now I am facing more of his anger for my restaurant choice,» he shared. But when Reddit resorts to ask if he is wrong, the support he receives is clear.
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«NTA,» wrote a commentator. «It’s your birthday. And it seems that she is completely your father’s wife. She is not any kind of stepmother.»
In response, the original poster shared what seems to be the heart of the matter. «That summarizes it,» he wrote. «I don’t consider any of them any real family. Only the people my father chose as his family.»